Same Face, Different Place: Beginnings by Helen J Christmas

This is the first in a series of books which span several decades, this one is set in the 1970's when the streets of London were particularly susceptible to corruption and gang warfare.

The central character, Eleanor, is the daughter of Ollie Chapman, a right hand man of Sammie Maxwell, one of the East End of London's feared bosses. Sammie sits comfortably at the top of his particular tree, thinking all is well when news reaches him there's a younger man in town. A man who incites so much terror that Sammie's patch begins to dwindle. Dominic Theakston begins to take over and Sammie is forced to retaliate. When Eleanor's father shoots Theakston's number one in the ensuing battle, killing him instantly, Theakston locks eyes with him and is set on the most terrible revenge possible. Chapman puts his precious daughter in Sammie Maxwell's care then leaves town, intending to return when things calm down, but Theakston has back up from powerful sources and things escalate in a way nobody saw happening. Eleanor is left with only her guile and the realisation that everyone has their price.

Helen Christmas gives us a thriller which explores love, hate, fear, terror, revenge, lust, betrayal and fortitude and this fast paced story really was difficult to put down. Eleanor is a fabulous character. At the tender age of 16 she is forced to grow up very quickly and lives in fear of her life but still she finds love and a reason to never give in. The background of life for some in 1970's London was very well described which gave the story an edge of truthfulness.

For a first novel this was written with a passion and consistency I would have expected from a more experienced writer and I really liked it. The only thing which gave me pause was wondering why Eleanor's father seems to have completely abandoned her but perhaps that will be explained in book two which, I have been informed, is due out late Summer 2013!

http://amzn.to/17ysjrk

http://www.samefacedifferentplace.co.uk

Twitter: Helen Christmas @SFDPBeginnings

The Goddess Workshop by Margaret K Johnson

I think Margaret's book, 'The Goddess Workshop', tackles a problem which some women tend to avoid talking about and she does it in a fun way, bringing together four women who probably wouldn't have met otherwise, in a story where they each re-evaluate who they are and how much they value themselves.

I liked it for it's honesty, its female solidarity and its friendship. 

Janet, Reenie, Kate and Estelle are all very different women, at different stages in their lives who are missing one vital component...sexual satisfaction. Three of them decide to attend a class on the subject at a local church hall, not quite knowing what to expect. The fourth, Janet, goes with her very proper neighbour Gwen, and they think they are there to attend a gardening class but it's not the flowers which are blooming! Gwen, horrified, walks out immediately in disgust and tries to drag Janet with her but Janet makes a stand and stays. As the four of them sit waiting for their tutor they contemplate a rather large...picture on display and start to wonder why on Earth they thought it was a good idea to attend.

I felt for Janet the most. Hers is an old story of a long marriage to a controlling husband and her need to find some self esteem again.

Margaret tackles this subject well. The story flows along and I felt empathy for the characters. I think this is a story with a bit of a message to all women - girls, don't settle for almost :)

http://amzn.to/14Vp9is

http://www.margaretkjohnson.co.uk

The Orion Chronicles: The Journal of Forgotten Secrets by Jeremy Shory

I have to say I am very taken with this book, the first in a series. The author has built up a whole world and created an enchanting story which is really going to appeal to young teenagers to fill the void which a certain well known young wizard has left. I didn't think anything would really match Harry Potter but this book could be a contender.

Orion's father dies unexpectedly under very strange circumstances. After Orion follows a boy he sees in the forest near his home, he finds himself suddenly immersed in the world of Furtayman, the home of Fangtooths, Razorbacks, Paranormals, Spellcasters, Sandshifters, Waterbogs and more. Together with his new friends, Grayson, Cremmel and Zora, he discovers who he really is, whom he can trust and who is not what they seem.

Jeremy Shory is a great storyteller. His writing draws you in as you meet believable characters and visit a fantasy world you can clearly imagine, thanks to his vivid descriptions. The world of Furtayman is magical and there is a cracking story being told by this talented writer to appeal to all lovers of fantasy fiction...not just the children.

This is a well written YA fantasy tale which will stand on its own for fans of this genre.

Jeremy has a website which is dedicated to the series and can be found here http://theorionchronicles.com

http://amzn.to/1cVfXzv

13 British Horror Stories by Rayne Hall

A special mention has to go to Rayne Hall for this collection of spooky stories.

Horror is not a genre I would normally choose to read but I spotted these on Twitter and decided to give them a go as I do like a good short story.

My favourite was "Take Me to St Roch's", a really eerie tale which should make even the bravest person think twice before picking up a hitchhiker...

"Never Leave Me" was also very good. I could still picture her an hour later!

Rayne has a gift for description and for finding those fears you may not know you have.

For a woman who is practically a horror virgin (!) they were a perfect introduction to the genre without the blood and gore of some stories.

And, of course, the tales are British...which probably means one or two of them are true...think on that before you pack your raincoat for tea with the Queen ;)

http://amzn.to/15T354e

https://sites.google.com/site/raynehallsdarkfantasyfiction/

Full Circle by Terry Tyler

Well, it was no good at all. As much as Melodie irritated me in 'Dream On' I just had to see what happened to her and the rest of them.

I had been waiting for 'Full Circle', the sequel to Terry's 'Dream On', and I grabbed a copy pronto on the day it hit Amazon. I wasn't disappointed and devoured it in one sitting.

Although Ariel and Dave are more central to the story, it was Janice who pulled at my heart strings. Her struggle to keep her relationship with Max going, after Dave let her down so badly in 'Dream On', was really heart wrenching and I willed her on all the way. Ariel and Dave really are meant to be together but he can't bear to leave another child without a father and Ariel really wants to make it big in music. She was all set for stardom in America and left Dave in 'Dream On' when a chance meeting opened the door for her. Now she's back but he has moved on. Shane is up to his old tricks again and Melodie has married above her station and is bored with her life of riches and comfort and yearns for someone more...earthy. I actually warmed to Melodie in the end. I think it is just her nature and the girl can't help it!

Terry isn't afraid to include difficult issues in her stories and handles the emotional side well. She exhibits her usual gift for observing people and it's a real feel-good story, with characters who resemble people we have all known; the wannabe, the trier, the Romeo and the one who drinks too much.

There is a bit of a surprise near the end which I wasn't expecting and more than one happy ending for this cool group of people.

Terry's writing is as superb as ever and she has nailed the conclusion of the tale of Dave, Ariel, Janice et all very well.

P.S. I secretly think Terry watches Jeremy Kyle and may even have a bit of a crush because he often gets a mention but I haven't had this confirmed...yet ;)

http://amzn.to/16SAn6b

http://terrytyler59.blogspot.co.uk

Twitter: @TerryTyler4

Authors...would you like the chance to be reviewed?

If you have a book you would like me to consider reading and possibly reviewing on my blog then please contact me through this blog or follow me on Twitter (@bodiciasapple) and DM me.

I can't promise to review every book I receive but it won't necessarily mean I think it is a bad book. It may simply be it isn't my type of book.

If I do review your book on here then I will also put a review automatically on Amazon UK and Amazon US. I will, of course, also put a link on Twitter a few times to my review and, on occasion, retweet your own links to your book.

Here are a few blogs I rather like...

I have finally updated my blog/website list to share with you all, all laid out beautifully down the side of the page.

Included, for your perusal, are the words of the Lion Hearts project writers, A V Barber and Maree Ward-Russell. I recommend a good look around A V Barber's site and the essays therein as they are wonderfully emotive.

I have also included a few author blogs as they do some interesting articles and interviews. Thought Scratchings is the blog of Craig Stone...slightly controversial (I like that) but he tells it straight (and I like that, also).

Matt Haig, has created a video for his upcoming book, The Humans, with help from his Twitter followers. It's actually very good and can be found here -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zX8V2OFHHbQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player

I hope you enjoy all these blogs as much as I do :)

Champagne Toast by Melissa Brown

I have to admit this book took me by surprise. I was expecting a gentle romance but instead I found myself very involved with the characters and practically chewing at the bit to shake both of them, like an aging agony aunt of some 1970's weekly magazine.

Phew.

This book takes two people who are very meant for each other and looks, in turn, at their points of view on why it went wrong. It's an old story of past baggage getting in the way, of hurt resurfacing and the way humans can't always shake it off when they enter a new relationship. It's a story of miscommunication. It's also a story of hope. I half wondered whether the author was writing from personal experience as it was all there, the anguish and the passion. Can they go back? Should they move on?

As Evan and Kate discovered, it can be a long road. Faith and trust is the key. Can they live without each other and instead just hide behind the walls they have built up?

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Champagne-Toast-ebook/dp/B00AYH543W/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1365421544&sr=8-1&keywords=champagne+toast

Melissa Brown on Twitter - @lissalou77

The Personal Pleasure of Book Reviews

I have always loved reading. When I was a child, one of my greatest pleasures was reading Enid Blyton's Famous Five and Secret Seven books. When I was a teenager, I discovered James Herriot's books in the school library and another love was born. These days I continue to read every day and enjoy discovering new authors to add to my reading list. Reading is, for me, an essential part of life. To discover. To lose myself. To feel emotions brought by another's words. To be inspired by their life and to add meaning to my own.

Being on Twitter has opened up a world of Indie books to me. Books which deserve to be seen. Writers who have spent months crafting their words and then having the courage to upload their book for others to see, critique and enjoy.

There are so many books to choose from in the self publication market a good book can go unnoticed just because of, for instance, a bad cover. I don't know the authors, I have found the ones I have chosen through Twitter and other various websites.

I will usually seek an author out if I plan to do a review and add them to my Twitter list so I can let them know I have done a review when I post it up. I have noticed the difficulties of self promotion which authors have. Twitter is a fabulous tool for self promotion but authors get criticism for overdoing their book plugs with constant tweets citing Amazon links etc to their work and for the retweets they do for other authors doing the same. Book reviewers blogs are the key for authors and allow them to showcase their work modestly. I hope my blog will add to the help these authors need to get noticed.

One thing I can say to self publicated authors on Twitter is this -

Please put 'author' in your Twitter name so people like me can find you easily!

Often authors will put their details at the end of their book but it's not enough to get noticed or found by the general population, in my opinion, especially in a place where many people have the same name as them! It also encourages people to find out what you have written, if they are as nosy as I am...

I read several books a week and review those on my blog which I feel deserve to be seen. It's only my opinion, of course, but I love the idea of spreading the news of a book which has made me think and tugs at my emotions or is simply a well told story.

I just love a good story and if it reaches my emotions then it reaches my blog :)

Swan Loch by Randy Mixter

This is a tale of mystery, murder and of hope. An alternative where things are the same but not quite. Where people exist or existed. I rather liked it.

Chris Hayward is a sheriff in the small town his father was before him. Practical yet emotive, he likes logic, he likes facts. When he receives a list of people who disappeared within a few days of each other, in towns which seem to be getting closer and closer by the mile and by the year, he is forced to admit there may be more to it and is horrified to see his town is next. With the date getting nearer, the FBI pour into the area but it doesn't stop citizens acting out of character. Those who know wait but the wind carries on blowing...

Bit of a drumroll moment but no spoilers ;)

Randy Mixter writes well with just the right amount of suspense and emotion. The ending gives hope and comfort to those who will need it most.

http://amzn.to/14oOga2

https://sites.google.com/site/randymixtersbooksite/home

Twitter: @Northwooder1

Quail Fried Rice by Jill Carroll

Quail Fried Rice was a perfect story for a lazy day. It's gentle pace and quality storyline was very welcome.

Jill Carroll is an excellent storyteller. Her descriptions of food dishes were tangible, mouthwatering and seriously made me want a plateful. She talked about the land so vividly I could see it in front of me. Quail Fried Rice is a story of two people who fall in love and who are accepted as they are and welcomed by the townspeople. I thought it was fabulous and, I think, a bit of a moral message in itself.

I am ignorant when it comes to life in a desert town in America and, as an added bonus, this book provided me with an excellent insight into fauna and flora in that part of the world. I stopped several times to look up various names and enjoyed the learning curve.

It kept me reading all day and I will be looking out for more fiction by this author :)

http://amzn.to/16Wss9I

http://www.jillcarroll.com

The Witch of Luna Hill by Neel Kay

I woke up very early this morning and one of the first things I did was start reading this book from where I left off late last night. Always a good sign!

The Witch of Luna Hill is billed as a fantasy/romance novel which, to me, doesn't really do it justice because it's actually a crackingly good fantasy novel which would stand on its own as just that. Although I feel this book is for the older teenage market, I really enjoyed it as a forty something woman and I will definitely be buying the second of this two book series when it is published.

The story centres around Aia, a young woman who was attacked and almost killed but was resuscitated by the villager who found her. She suffers amnesia and, taking a name given to her by those who found her, she begins a new life. She has nightmares, which she assumes are flashbacks of her past, but she can't bring them to focus. A chance meeting with Merian, the sister of the feared Lyder, takes her home to a people who expect her to save them all.

There is a real feel of Scandinavian lore about this book and it was no surprise to find out the author, Neel Kay is a Dane. Her webpage can be found here: http://neelkay.wordpress.com

http://amzn.to/1bH4noG

Twitter: @NeelKay

Flawed Gods by Angela B Mortimer

Flawed Gods is written by an author who has immersed herself in this fictional tale and it flows at a good pace. As I read, it struck me this story would, with a little tweaking, make a rather good animated film for adults.

The Varan's are an elder race of aliens who seed planets and watch as evolution plays it's part on the species they have created. This isn't the core of the story, however, as that honour belongs to Doella, the main female character. She bewitches at a glance any human or alien male who is in sight of her and, being of the race she is, this means she usually ends up in bed with them. I have to admit I personally found this a little wearing and predictable after a while and, although it is part of her character and personality, I was happy to note there were some she kept at bay! However, this did not detract from the story and, for certain readers, it may even enhance it...

This is a story of a woman who holds very different views to others of her race. A woman who refuses to be controlled by rules and other's opinions. Flawed Gods seems to be almost a back story to who Doella is and the importance of certain people she meets and takes forward with her on her journey to discover the role she must fulfill and those who demand it of her.

This is the first book in a four part series and the second part, Hyclos, has recently been released. I think it holds great promise and I am looking forward to reading the second novel and watching the story move onward.

Flawed Gods http://amzn.to/1afhP53

Hyclos http://amzn.to/16SD8UT

Twitter: @AngelaMortimer2

Dysfunctional Romance! by Derick Hudson

I am so glad I decided to buy this book. The cover is not brilliant as it doesn't really give you a clue about the content of the story but, to be fair, I am not sure what could.

The story is about Barry and Sandra who are absolutely meant to be together because they are both as mad as a balloon and this is what makes their story so good. It's all about acceptance of each other and their flaws, a real feel-good read. It also happens to be one of the funniest books I have read for a while, with sharp and hilarious one liners I wish I had written myself and may well start using verbally around the house just because they make me giggle so much.

Derick Hudson has an eye for the ridiculous and it flows along at a pace in this novel. I loved the banter and relationship the two main characters have, both wonderfully real and believable.

Derick Hudson writes not as a typical male or female author who might stereotype their opposite sex but just as a great storyteller and I hope he writes a sequel to the story of these two very likable characters.

http://amzn.to/18CuZVR

http://derickhudson.blogspot.co.uk

Twitter: @Derick_Hudson

Are We Nearly There Yet? by Ben Hatch

I have a soft spot for travel books and have been a huge fan of Bill Bryson for many years so I was looking forward to reading this one from Ben Hatch.

It is a story about his travels whilst writing a guidebook for Frommer's (the American equivalent of Time Out, apparently) about visiting England with your family and where to go etc.

The story Ben writes is a very personal one. He takes with him his wife Dinah and their two small children on a five month tour of England. A very brave move in itself, as any parent will appreciate. He tells of the places they visit and the reception they receive but moreover he tells of the emotions of the trip and what it cost him to do it. 

His father is very unwell but, proud of his son and what he is doing, he insists he carries on with the trip and Ben does this, despite misgivings and the pull to be with his father. The trip he makes shows his father the family man Ben has become and is a legacy to the man he loves very much. I found it very emotive, laughing one minute at scary episodes in haunted houses to crying with empathy the next as his father's illness unfolds. It's a snapshot of life.

The only criticism I can give is to wonder why he only just brushed into Suffolk and left again before he was photographed. I can only hope he was on a road on which he had to cross the border twice and there was a yokel hovering over the sign, pointing out his misfortune and laughing at his plight. Bryson never mentions Suffolk either. I don't know what it is, there really isn't any substance to the rumour we don't let tourists back out again until they have ploughed six fields by hand and milked a herd of cows. They only do that in parts of Norfolk. Allegedly ;) 

P.S. This book is currently at the ridiculous price of 98p, I suggest you grab a copy quickly before he realises...

(I have since been informed by Mr Hatch they did visit Suffolk on this trip and enjoyed themselves but I am leaving the menacing yokel where he is, the hours not up yet and I want my money's worth *smiles*)

http://amzn.to/16SEU8s

Twitter: @BenHatch

Martha's Medicine by C C McMillan

This week I snuggled up with Martha's Medicine, a lovely book by C.C. McMillan. I loved the title as it reminded me of a band I used to have a bit of a thing about, All About Eve, and their song "Martha's Harbour". It ended up being rather poignant as the character Martha is indeed a harbour for lost souls.

The story revolves around a popstar who has lost his way and a woman, Martha, who is hiding from life for very good reasons. To begin with I had reservations about the story, because it seemed a little unlikely the P.A. of a famous popstar would send her boss to a woman who writes a letter asking her to do so, but I was soon drawn in to the beautiful descriptions and images the author brought to mind. Her descriptions of Scotland were wonderful and I felt as if I was back there, watching this story unfold.

Martha's story is really touching and believable. The characters background story has made her the woman she is, wanting to help those she sees in pain now because she couldn't before when she was too young. Danny, the popstar in the novel, is like so many of the people in the public eye who have believed their own publicity and have gone off the rails into excess, seemingly past saving to those around them. Martha offers him a way out if he will take it and together they make a story which really should be turned in to a film.

This book was a joy to read and, for a first novel, beautifully crafted. A writer to watch out for.

http://amzn.to/16SEwqA

The Liebster Blog Award

I was asked to take part in the Liebster Blog award by Terry Tyler whose blog can be found here -

http://terrytyler59.blogspot.co.uk

Terry's blog is always full of great stuff and well worth a good look around. I particularly loved her post on getting older, very funny and as a lady of a certain age I could fully appreciate what she was saying, here it is for those of you who may have missed it

http://terrytyler59.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/the-truth-about-getting-old.html


The Liebster Blog Award is to recognise blogs who have less than 200 followers and are worthy of adding to your reading list. The idea is to post 11 random facts about yourself, answer 11 random questions asked by the person who nominated you and then think up 11 questions for 11 bloggers you personally recommend. Since my blog is barely hatched, I can't really nominate eleven other bloggers yet but I will come back to this at a later date and do a special write up on blogs which I really enjoy :)


11 Random Facts About Me

1. My heart lives beside the mountains of Scotland but the rest of me lives in a town. One day I shall go and join my heart :)

2. I love to laugh and do so, often. Sometimes I do so rather inappropriately. My grandad used to say I would 'laugh to see a puddin' crawl'. I see the humour in all sorts of things I probably should not!

3. I love rock music and do a mean air guitar. I cried buckets when Freddie Mercury died, for the loss of the entertainer and for the fact I never did get to see him live on stage.

4. I do a good impression of a chicken and speak fluent Rooster although my Hen could use some work. This has served me well in the past whilst egg collecting and has enabled me to escape the coop unscathed.

5. I have an enquiring mind and particularly love geosciences and astrosciences. I agree with Professor Stephen Hawking on many things and, in particular, his opinion it's a bad idea to broadcast our existence to extra terrestrials (Active SETI). If the equations are correct then we should be getting a reply any day now. If you want me, I will be in the nearest bunker with a can of baked beans and brushing up on my Klingon.

6. I wear glasses as contact lenses don't suit me as I have, according to the optician, 'funny shaped eyeballs'. Bit harsh, I thought. I wanted a consultation not a deconstruction of my fragile ego.

7. I am 5' 3 1/2" tall. I used to be 5' 7" tall but lost the extra inches when I stopped wearing high heels on a daily basis. The climate down here is slightly milder but speaking at the chest level of normal sized people can be a little wearing at times. Fortunately, my other half is also gnome like and therefore having a snog doesn't cause neck problems. Handy, that ;)

8. I dye my hair as the grey (Silver. SILVER!) highlights have already started and, until I can safely dye it purple and spit at people in a decade or so when more socially acceptable, I am taking no chances. The wiry beasts and I do battle on a daily basis. Just lately they seem to be multiplying quicker than wasps do in the summer when you have just sat down for a picnic.

9. I love to write, draw, paint and be creative. Some of this is successful and some I wouldn't dare show or admit to in public. The dark recesses of my mind is not a holiday you should go on without a nice big life insurance policy and perhaps a rescue helicopter on stand by ;)

10. I don't feel the need to be famous. I don't want to be on television. I have dodged cameras and family photos for years!

11. I don't watch much television. I spend my free time writing, creating, listening to music, playing at photography and filling my head with as much knowledge as this increasingly aging brain can absorb. If something peaks my interest then I will research it until I have uncovered every little detail...and then I will probably write about it :)



These are the questions set by Terry for me and her other nominees to answer :)

1. What's your favourite flavour of crisps?

Bovril. Unfortunately, when Walker's Crisps took over the brand of Smith's they got rid of Bovril crisps. I wrote asking for their reinstatement but was told 'No, but we do beef ones'. No consideration, I thought. Well. Honestly.

2. How many of other people's blogs do you read per day, on average?

Not as many as I ought to or would like to, at the moment.

3. If you weren't promoting your book/blog, would you still use Twitter/Facebook so much? If not, how much would you?

Twitter is a great source for links to science related articles and discussions so I use it for that too and for networking with like minded people in as gentle a way as possible. I am still working out the etiquette and building a list of people I am interested in :)

4. Do you smoke? If not, did you ever? (I know at least one person I've tagged has good reason to really, really hate it)

I tend to 'vape' these days on an electronic cigarette although not in public much, as it looks like I am addicted to some sort of drug, doesn't it? What's that you say? Oh. Fair point!

5. When a doctor asks you how much you drink, do you lie?

No, I don't need to as I rarely drink unless out for the night, which I rarely am.

6. What is your star sign? Do you know about the typical characteristics of that sign, and if so, which ones apply to you?

My star sign is Sagittarius, apart from that I couldn't possibly comment in public ;)

7. Do you remember your first blog post? What was it about?

I do indeed. It was meant to be forthright and positive but came across as arrogant and a little bit know-all so I deleted it and sent it off into the ether with a flea in it's ear and a warning not to do that again.

8. Imagine you have to give up these four things for a month: alcohol, writing, listening to music, television. Starting with the one you would find the easiest to give up, in what order would you find them easiest to do without?

I could happily give up everyday broadcasted television as I hardly watch it but would need a set for the home cinema system to connect to. Alcohol is also no problem as I don't bother unless I am out in the evening. Writing/listening to music...eek, no no no please don't take those away, I'll be good, I promise!

9. I love QI, Have I Got News For You, Mock The Week, Ed Byrne, Frankie Boy,e sometimes, Fawlty Towers, Python, Catherine Tate.. and loads more. I loathe Michael McIntyre. What do you/don't you find funny?

I like Monty Python, Blackadder, Catherine Tate, Miranda Hart and Jo Brand to name a few top ones. I detest The Office, can't see anything funny in it or Ricky Gervais. He needs to be fed salted tea. I find him as funny as I would somebody swiping my last chocolate bar when I have PMT. It's not clever. Pay the price :)

10. Do you watch soap operas? If so, which is your favourite, and if not, why not?

Good grief, no. I have a huge family, of which I am the matriarch, and they provide me with more than enough excitement, thank you very much. There's a chocolate box of emotions just waiting for me to choose daily from around these parts, let me tell you. Watch it on TV? In my pajamas without chocolate medicine on standby? What ARE you suggesting? ;)

11. And finally - please put a link here to any of your blog posts - tell us what it's about, and why you have chosen it!

I think it is going to have to be this one http://a-womans-wisdom.blogspot.co.uk/2013/01/its-just-heap-of-metala-heap-of-junk.html because it beautifully illustrates why I don't need to watch soap operas haha :)

Changing my mindset

In my pursuit of finding myself, (yes, I'm still as lost as Paddington Bear but without the label), a book was suggested to me called Dying to be Me written by Anita Moorjani.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Dying-Be-Me-Journey-Healing/dp/1848507836/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1359997497&sr=1-1

This book is a true story, written by a lady who had very advanced cancer until her Near Death Experience and subsequent thought processes cured her. 

Now, the scientist in me was a little skeptical about this at first but as I turned the pages I felt this was written by a woman who had indeed had something happen to her which was nothing short of a miracle. Her only reason for writing this down and sharing it was to tell everyone what had happened to her and to perhaps help people in the telling.

Now, I have to be honest, I am not a person who sits and dreams about lottery wins or eternal beauty miracles (gold leaf face cream...really?!) and nor do I care if people will think I am common/poor/unworthy of direct communication if I don't have a car with this years registration on it. 

I have always thought I should be happy with what I have been given in life and it's rather rude of me when thoughts creep in of wanting something different or more.

I don't dream big, I dream comfort sized.

However, I do have a small confession which I pause to make public. I cosmic ordered my other half. Yes, you read that correctly, but please read on.

There I was on a warm summer evening when my mind wandered by itself to a place of considerable comfort and joy where Colin Firth and Johnny Depp took turns to run down the beach towards me (and at one point towards each other...don't ask, I can't explain it either) and I happily passed a few minutes pondering on said images. Then I grappled with Johnny Depp to toss him out of my mind (Colin had left when asked, ever the gent) and I started to think about what I really wanted in a man. 

I had heard about cosmic ordering and I knew if I was to succeed I had to be precise and believe in it totally. So I mentally wrote a list, correcting a few things as I went along (he didn't really NEED startlingly blue bedroom eyes, did he?) and I came up with a list of things I really felt I would be very content with. 

And then I took a breath and said out loud exactly what I would like and when he was to be delivered by (I omitted the type of courier, I didn't want to be picky) , thanked the Universe profusely and left it at that.

Now the Universal Powers That Be have a sense of humour, very like mine I believe, as in the period before final delivery I was sent some samples of manhood who were dodgy to say the least. 

I even ventured into Cougar land but decided I did enough babysitting already and so I didn't bother going there again, thank you very much, so kind but no. 

It really wasn't panning out well and I began to feel slightly short changed and over taxed, monetarily and emotionally.

With one day to go before my cosmic delivery deadline, my confidence and belief was starting to waiver. Had I foolishly bought in to this Cosmic Ordering malarkey too much? Had I sat back and believed I deserved something too good for me? Were the male specimens laid out before me really all there was on offer?

And then he appeared. Well, actually he had been right under my nose since around the time of the ordering process but I just hadn't noticed. At the end of our first date I realised this rather gorgeous man was ticking some very clear boxes on my mental list and here I am, several years later, still cheering loudly at my very good fortune and speaking words of gratitude for what I have found. 

So you may think I would have cosmic ordered with great abandon ever since, right? It worked so let's see the menu, yeah? 

Um, nope. 

Not an order since. Not even a small starter or apperitif. 

Why? I didn't want to appear greedy. I have been tempted when times have been difficult but I have resisted. I just couldn't do it. Didn't think I deserved it. 

Then, I read Anita Moorjani's book. I realised it was actually okay to ask for help. It wasn't greedy or selfish to want things. It was like a bit of a weight had been lifted. That might seem strong but it is true for me. 

This woman gives you permission to love yourself in a healthy way. She has a story to tell which needs to be heard by all of us. At no point does Anita TELL you what to do or think. She makes it clear from the beginning she is re-telling exactly what happened to her and you are to make your own judgement.

I thought it was going to be a bit too hippy happy clappy for me. It wasn't. It was inspiring. And passionate. And she gave me a lot to think about. What happened to her is nothing short of a miracle. A real one.  

If you lack confidence, feel guilty or feel in need of permission to be YOU then read this book. You won't regret it.

No, of course you don't look stupid with a piece of glowing plastic in your mouth...honestly!

Well, I have looked at the weather and decided I am no longer going to stand in the cold with the outcasts, puffing on our sticks and pretending we find the miniature summer house with hard seats charming.

I am going to try and quit smoking. Try. It's not that I don't want to because I do. Fag ash Lil is so last year.

Of course, a sure fire way to bash the ash would be to get pregnant again, as I have always given up instantly I know there is a baby brewing in the pot.

Hmm.

However, the thought of changing nappies and breastfeeding again only serves to have me begging for a pack of 20 and a vodka to go.

So I have bought an electronic cigarette. Yes, I know. Shh.

It's looking at me now from the bedside cabinet, winking at me as it straightens its tie and strikes a pose.

I have read the instructions carefully and believe I am sucking correcting to the full benefit of both of us, my nicotine habit and it's battery life.

But it is a learning curve.

I sit here chewing furiously on a piece of normal minty gum in the hope it will distract me from the fact. And the fact is, I really want a cigarette.

I may mention this again, in say three months, but this isn't a 'let's give up smoking, sing songs and hold hands' blog, its merely a warning my nerves have been hacked and I could go a little crazy over the next few days.

Do you know, it MIGHT be easier to go for the pregnancy option, fed up with this gum chewing already!

The Art of Letter Writing

When was the last time you put pen to paper and wrote a letter to a friend simply for the pleasure of doing so?

I came across a talk by a lovely lady called Hannah Brencher on the fabulous TED talks http://on.ted.com/dMT2 where she tells the story of letter writing to strangers and expresses the pleasure she and they got from the experience. Personally, I think this is a fab idea. It's all too easy to write an email and send it but there is something special about holding a letter in your hand and reading it whilst enjoying a cup of tea and a chocolate biscuit.

All too often, the letter box goes and all that appears are bills, junk mail and more junk mail. How nice to go to the door and find someone has been thinking about you enough to grab some paper and a pen and write something just for you. Better still if they have popped a couple of photos in with it which you can frame straight away without fighting with your printer (that last bit may just be me but the flipping thing drinks ink and is always empty when I want to use it! Ha!)

So take some time out from technology, buy some beautiful paper and start creating for someone you care about, they will love it :)